Prompt And Circumstance 2, Electric Boogaloo

19 Dec

I am legally required to mention “electric boogaloo” every time I mention 2. Seriously, they dock my pay if I don’t.

WordPress has a delightful habit of posting the “Daily Prompt”, a function that suggests what people should write about. And I have a delightful habit of making fun of them! Because I feast on the tears of heart-broken writers, that’s why.

Ahem.

If your government (local or national) accomplishes one thing in 2013, what would you like that to be?: They should discover… (pause for effect)… time travel! Then, we’d go back in time to when booze was cheaper and drink the apocalypse away.

The end of the world was bad enough, but the hangover…

Tell us about a guilty pleasure that you hate to love: I would, but the judge said I have to stop talking about it in public.

If there were a real Fountain of Youth, would you drink the water?: Yes, because if we know anything, it’s that 15 is just not fucking young enough.

What question do you hate to be asked? Why?: “What are you doing with that knife?”

What’s your ideal Saturday morning? Are you doing those things this morning? Why not?: Is this an interrogation  “Tell me what you did Saturday. Did you relax? Did you have a good time? Did you, you fucking swine?!”

You have to have a dramatic light in an interrogation. It's some kind of RULE.

“ARE YOU ENJOYING THE LONG WEEKEND, YOU SON OF A BITCH?!”

Write a letter to your mom. Tell her something you’ve always wanted to say, but haven’t been able to: “Dear Mom; YOU’LL NEVER FIND THE BOMB MWA HAH HAH HAH. Sincerely, Erik.”

What is your worst quality?: You assume that I have a “worst quality”! I AM ERIK. I SEE ALL AND KNOW ALL!

A writer once said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” If this is true, which five people would you like to spend your time with?: Joseph Stalin, my identical clone, Santa Claus, my identical clone with boobs, and Snowflame.

Cocaine actually makes a terrible god.

I don’t have a picture of me with boobs, so here’s Snowflame!

The year is drawing to a close. What would you put in a 2012 time capsule?: A copy of “Call Me Maybe”, and a revolver with one bullet.

Tell us about your hero: Jesus, you’re nosy! You’re like that creepy guy on the bus who thinks I don’t know when he steals my hair.

“What do you want your government to do? What’s your guilty pleasure? Do you want to be younger? What do you want in a time capsule? Can I have your underwear?”

Advertisements

2 Responses to “Prompt And Circumstance 2, Electric Boogaloo”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Prompt And Circumstance 3: Never Take Prompts From Strangers « A VERY STRANGE PLACE - January 4, 2013

    […] guess it’s time to make another ”Prompt And […]

  2. 7 Great Moments In The History Of Profanity « A VERY STRANGE PLACE - February 16, 2013

    […] all the times I take (affectionate!) pot shots at WordPress, they’ve only really responded once. Specifically, they popped down in to a […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: