Omegle Wears It’s Sunglasses At Night

24 Feb

I like to think of the internet as humanity’s coalesced subconscious. And as you’d expect, humanity’s subconscious happens to be filled with racism, naked people, violence, and Danny Phantom fan fiction.

(Danny and The Box Ghost are my OTP.)

But if one needs some kind of break from the violence, naked people and Danny Fucktom (there’s still plenty of racism, though), there’s always Omegle’s Spy Mode, a mode that allows one to answer questions by random twats! There, all the naked people and violence is merely implied.

Ahem.

Gringos Go Back Home!!!!!!!!!: This is the weirdest E.T sequel I’ve ever seen.

What are your thoughts?: Boobs, mostly.

Whats You’r Favorite Dr. Seuss Book: “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Boob Fish”

(See what I mean?)

What an attractive clipboard.

It’s a condition.

And best actress goes to.. MMEEE!!! for being beautiful and for being loved by everyone.. OMG I hate my life.. I HATE MY FUCKING LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!: Okay. That’s just swell.

what should i do to get a guy to notice me ? how should i dress act do my hair and i want to talk to him for the first time but i dont know what to say: Strip naked, wear a comically oversized sombrero and communicate solely in a system of clucks and whistles.

It’s what every man wants. I assume.

Hi I am Nicholas Cage. Recently, I took a few nude pictures of myself. You can download it here: [URL REDACTED]: Wait WHAT.

(I am legally required to play that clip every time somebody brings up Nicolas Gage.)

“thats a fish tank “, “you’re a fish tank”: You have the wit of a nine year old. And that’s coming from Mister “OH GOD, NOT THE BOOBIES”.

if you could go on a date with anyone on the planet, who would it be?: My exact doppelgänger, but with a vagina.

gay straight or lesbian?: The only possible answer is “omnisexual”.

The girl I like has a boyfriend? Should I wait or move on? Its weird who people choose!?: It’s like my Mom always said: Just because there’s a goalie, doesn’t mean you can’t score.

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