Freshly Riffed 36: But I See By The Look On Her Face, If I Keep My Mouth Shut, I’ll Save Some Time

10 Jun

Welcome back to Freshly Riffed, the only webseries with wow, that’s a long title. I mean, seriously. I know I’ve taken to naming these things after Jonathan Coulton lyrics, but still. That’s too much, even for me.

You mad, mad bastard!

According to the hushed whispers carried on by the screams of the innocents, Freshly Riffed is where I make fun of the titles of Freshly Pressed blog posts. Also, they apparently think I should invest in stocks.

Each title will be linked to the original author, and remember; All mockery is for mockery’s sake only. Please don’t sue me, I’m very poor.

Ahem.

The Deteriorating Syrian Civil War And Humanitarian Crisis: Gosh, I sure do love it when you talk purty like that, stranger!

Naming And Claiming: Wait, so naming something denotes ownership?

DAMN YOU MOTHER!

When The Village Doesn’t Need You Anymore: Don’t worry, I’m sure some other village needs an idiot.

See, look at how competent all this is! It’s horrible!

For My Sister, On Her Wedding Day: I’m going to assume it’s either a gun or the key to her chastity belt.

The Cost Of Memory: This is the weirdest auction.

Plain Jane: Plain Jane got on a plane and trained Max Payne to fight with a cane.

The Return Of The Crack Baby. Again: Mr. T, take it away!

Thanks!

I Sold My Fat Jeans On EBay And Now I Want Them Back: Ooh, I wanna watch that action movie!

The Letter That Killed Me: DAMN YOU WWWWW!

My Struggle With Dance: It’s okay, you can dance if you want to!

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One Response to “Freshly Riffed 36: But I See By The Look On Her Face, If I Keep My Mouth Shut, I’ll Save Some Time”

  1. aliceatwonderland June 11, 2013 at 8:03 am #

    I first read one of those as “I sold my fat Jesus on Ebay” and I was really confused. Not that this wouldn’t have been a normal title on Freshly Pressed. Have you seen the literal video of Safety Dance? The only way the video makes sense is as an LSD trip.

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