Madhere: Part Twenty

16 Aug

(For the first story arc of Madhere, click here. For parts Eleven TwelveThirteenFourteenFifteenSixteenSeventeenEighteen, or Nineteen, click here.)

“… And that’s about when I keeled over from blood loss,” finished Darren. “The bouncer called me an ambulance, and they decided to pick you up at the same time to check for alcohol poisoning. Then they stitched me up, then I slept all night, then I woke up with you sitting there, then I told you this story, then I stopped telling you this story, and then I don’t know what happened.”

“Wow, really? I don’t remember any of that!” Lilah cradled her head in her arms.

“Considering what you drank, I’m surprised you’re still capable of sentient thought.”

Darren was laying in his hospital bed, absently mindedly fiddling with his blanket, as Lilah sat at the end of the bed, rubbing her temples in a vague attempt to rub the hangover away.

It wasn’t working.

“Weren’t we gonna go research my civil war story yesterday?” Lilah frowned. “How the fuck did we end up at the Horrible Mistake?”

“You wanted to get laid, because… of no particularly reason.”

There is no way I’m opening that particular can of worms again. We’re running out of gay bars.

Lilah stretched, and there is absolutely no way that Darren started ogling her chest right then.

None at all.

“Would it be okay if I left? I know you just got stabbed, but I’m really late on my post, and Todd’s been texting me about it all night…”

Oh no, the fact that I just got myself ventilated by a hobo to commence a scam to keep you from fucking my gothy BDSM client and get you to a hospital for alcohol poisoning (despite the fact that you haven’t even thanked me) means that I of course don’t want your motherfucking suppor-

Darren sighed.

“Nah, it’s cool. Wasn’t gonna do anything fun here anyway.”

Lilah flashed a brilliant smile. “M’mkay, see you later, Darren!”

She darted out the hospital room, then immediately stuck her head back in.

“By the way, Darren… thank you. You’re a great friend.” Lilah smiled again, and left.

“Yeah, right.” sighed Darren. “A great ‘friend’. Fucker.”


[Welcome, to the end of the Second Madhere Story Arc! I hope you had fun, and, I have to say, I can see why there are so many relationship dramas. They are SO FUN TO WRITE YOU HAVE NO IDEA I MEAN SERIOUSLY.]

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