Freshly Riffed 45: When We Go Up To Bed, You’re Just Not Good, It’s Such A Shame!

19 Aug

Welcome back to Freshly Riffed, the only web series with a tongue so sharp, it can lick a man to the centre of his Tootsie-Roll pop and make his widow orgasm twice before he hits the ground.

This owl has SEEN some things.

According to the gangs of whores who roam Winnipeg, looking for unwary travellers, Freshly Riffed is where I make fun of the titles of Freshly Pressed blog posts. Also, OH GOD, THEY’RE HERE! BOARD UP THE WINDOWS!

Each title will be linked to the original author, and remember; All mockery is for mockery’s sake only.

Ahem.

I Really Don’t Want To Punch You In The Face

Wow, you are awful at flirting.

Accountability Washington Style

Oh god, politics? QUICK, ABANDON THE COMMENT SECTIONS! LADIES AND SPAMBOTS FIRST!

In A Blog Rut?

If you people keep saying the word “blog”, I will poop in your server. I will go online, find your server, take a plane to your server, break in to the building that has your server, and poop in it.

Right in it.

Not pictured: Me. Pooping. In your server.

40 Days Without Booze

So… you’re dead?

Thumbs Up (No Homo).

Oh, please, you’re on the internet. It’s ALL homo.

Whose Health Is It Anyway?

Ah, yes. The gritty Whose Line Is It Anyway/Saw crossover we all wanted.

Please tell me nobody actually wanted that.

A Double Life

Yeah, I know what you’re talking about. I, too, lead a double life! And one hand, I’m the adorably suave motherfucker you all see before you. And on the other hand, I’m Beyonce.

Don't even lie. You saw it coming.

Don’t even lie. You saw it coming.

Health Equals Not-Death

I… I can’t deny that.

Taking The Hype Out Of Hyperloop

So… Rloop?

Miley Tweeted: “I Know What Color My Skin Is…”

What?! Miley Cyrus has SKIN?!

I was too distracted by her- seriously, the fuck is up with your hair?

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One Response to “Freshly Riffed 45: When We Go Up To Bed, You’re Just Not Good, It’s Such A Shame!”

  1. Blogdramedy August 20, 2013 at 6:52 am #

    You picked the word “blog.” I would have picked the word “rut.” *grin*

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