Horror By Numbers, One, Two, Three!

23 Oct

Once that you’ve decided on a movie,

First, you must make a screenplay at the start.

And if you find investors are still willing,

Then you can turn a jump scare in to art!

 

There really isn’t any need for slashers.

Psycho-thrillers take a little more finesse.

If you convince your viewers ghosts are real,

Then it avoids an awful lot of mess!

 

Because it’s horror by numbers, one, two, three!

It’s eas- i- er to learn if you’re sc- a- a- ary!

It’s horror by numbers, one, two, three!

It’s eas- i- er to learn if you’re cr- a- a- zy!

 

Now, if you have a taste for this experience,

Wallet flush with your very first success,

Then you must try a sequel or a prequel,

And you’ll find your fangirls bother you much less!

 

Writing horror is like anything you take to!

It’s a habit forming need for more and more!

You can bump off every member of your cast and crew,

And anybody acting like a whoooooore!

 

Because it’s horror by numbers, one, two, three!

It’s eas- i- er to learn if you’re sc- a- a- ary!

It’s horror by numbers, one, two, three!

It’s eas- i- er to learn if you’re cr- a- a- zy!

 

You can join the Wik-i of the illustrious,

In Fangoria’s great, dark, hall of fame!

All our greatest killers were memetic,

At least the ones that we all know by name…

 

But you can reach the top of your production,

If you become the hero to the fans,

For horror is the sport of the elected,

And you don’t need to lift a finger of your hand!

 

Because it’s horror by numbers, one, two, three!

It’s eas- i- er to learn if you’re sc- a- a- ary!

It’s horror by numbers, one, two, three!

It’s eas- i- er to learn if you’re utt- er- ly cra- zy!

Don’t even lie, you love this.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: