Freshly Riffed 56: When It Comes To Cockneys, You’re Down On Your Knees

12 Nov

Welcome back to Freshly Riffed, the only web series broadcasted deep in to space in the hope of scaring off all of the aliens with dick jokes!

Yes, that is accurate.

Yes, that is accurate.

According to the sentient knitting needles who have taken over the world, Freshly Riffed is where I make fun of the titles of Freshly Pressed blog posts. Also, quick, get the thimbles! They’re our only hope!

Each title will be linked to the original author, and remember; All mockery is for mockery’s sake only.

Ahem!

What It Has Taken Me 33 Years To Learn

“The shoe goes on the foot, it’s all so obvious now!”

“You’ll Make A Great Wife Someday”

“But first thing’s first, hand me that scalpel.”

No One Goes To Kindergarten In A Diaper

They do if we load them in to this catapult!

Hmm, need to check my aim. Pass me that practice toddler, will ya?

School Suspends Teen Boy For Carrying Purse. Why?

It’s simple! See, the purse shoots lasers.

Things My Therapist Has Taught Me

“Everything you think of is a penis. Yes, even that. ESPECIALLY that.”

Hanging On The Telephone

See, first of all, you need a noose, a state executioner and an iPhone…

Hunters Arrive, For Better Or Worse

Annnnd now I’m imagining bounty hunters hunting down the comic strip, For Better Or For Worse.

And all was good in the world.

TAKE THE SHOT.

Sunshine State Of Mind

OH GOD NO MY MIND IS A VAMPIRE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.

The Internet Makes Me Feel Bad

Oh, you think that made you feel bad? That was nothing. Here, hand me that ice pick and lemon juice, I’ll give you an abject lesson!

: Peekaboo :

Where’d he come from?! Quick, open fire, this ends today! Kill them all, let God sort ’em out!

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One Response to “Freshly Riffed 56: When It Comes To Cockneys, You’re Down On Your Knees”

  1. Jen and Tonic November 13, 2013 at 12:18 am #

    Freud cornered the market on dick jokes.

    Thanks for linking up!

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