Omegle On The Treetops, All Night Long

12 Aug

I am completely astonished that Omegle hasn’t given me a marketing deal yet. Come on, I figured relentlessly making fun of you was enough to get in your good graces!

[Editor’s Note: … All of a sudden, your failed relationships make perfect sense.]

… STOP SAYING THINGS.

Ahem!

Hey girls, I rate anything (Face, boobs, ass, legs, etc..) kjk me

… You DO realize that the internet already has porn, right? You don’t need to make your own!

Why are feminists such c**ts?

Gee, you must be real popular with the ladies.

Bored, John. By the way, there’s another bag of fingers in the fridge. May need to buy new groceries. SH

The Saw/Sherlock crossover that the world was… apparently asking for!

… Sawlock?

whats the biggest penis you’ve seen?

12 feet. He has to diddle people from across an auditorium.

my feet getting licked by my bf feels so good

Good for you, I guess. Want a parade?

PREMATURELY EJACULATES OVER YOUR AWESOMENESS 😀

Aww, you’re too sweet!

Soooo, are you seeing anyone?

ARE YOU PREPARED FOR THE CAPPOCALYPSE??

Eh, not as bad as the Alpacalypse.

what do you eat when your sad

Cocks, mostly.

Do you like to swallow your partner’s “juices”? 

Well, that’s a very pleasant way of putting that. And on a related note, I’m asexual now.

Advertise a lamp

*whistles innocently*

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