… What Does Omegle Mean, Anyway?

17 Sep

… No, seriously, I’ve been making fun of Omegle for years, and… like, what? What… what even is that? That’s not a word, that’s a bad Scrabble hand!

Ahem!

What’s the most effective way to kill myself: gun, pills & alcohol, or hanging?

Well, Trash Humpers certainly came close enough.

Is it a good idea to grab someone sexy and tell them “HEY! GIVE ME EVERYTHING TONIGHT!”

Goddammit, who gave Pitbull an internet connection?! Somebody get the tranq gun!

how many cocks have you sucked?

In total, or currently? Because, currently… okay, gentlemen, please take a number so I can get a full count!

Is it truly worth it to die for a family member or friend? Yes, you’d be a hero, but that person would feel guilty for your death for the rest of their lives. Is that “brave” act actually cowardly bec

… You can tell that this is a DEEP PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION, because it gets cut off halfway through. What, did the internet’s pretension blocker finally have enough of your crap?

Also, please tell me the Pretension Blocker is a real thing.

I think I actually own that hat.

My straight friend just willingly purchased a Prius. How long does it take before he starts trying to fuck dudes?

Oh. Casual homophobia. Charming.

SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! FACEY FACEY FACE FACE FACE! AT THE SOUND OF THE BELL IT WILL BE FACESHOOTING O’CLOCK! BONGGGGG! KNOCK KNOCK WHO’S THERE SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! END OF JOKE! CMON SHOOT MY FACE!!!!

Can we put these last two guys together? I would PAY to see that buddy comedy.

How would you improve your memory? A lot of people have problem with rememebering but it’s pretty easy to improve your memory. All you have to do is practice this technique that allows you to memorize

Spoiler Alert: The technique involves doing the kinds of drugs that other drugs do to get freaky.

my dick is 7″ inches, fact.

Dude, if you feel the need to say that, trust me, your dick is so small, you probably make pinpricks when erected. When you get hard, you could use your cock to darn pants. What I am saying is that your wang is secretly a string a dental floss with aspirations of greatness.

[Editor’s Note: … How many of these do you have?]

Way too many.

Bow chicka bow wow.

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