Internet Campfire Tales: BEN Drowned, A Creepypasta Review, Part Eleven

13 Nov

Am I still allowed to call this “Internet Campfire Tales” now that it’s started snowing? Snow and fire don’t tend to get along. What’s the winter equivalent? “Burning Christmas Tree Tales”? “I Doused A Snowman In Gasoline And I Don’t Regret It Tales”? “Baby, It’s Creepypasta Outside”?

internet_campfire_tales

 

Previously, on BEN DrownedJadusable has finally revealed that despite BEN’s… efforts to stop him? With magic? Anyway, he apparently had a secret message. Presumably it had something to do with drinking more Ovaltine.

Ahem!

“It worked, and the video was uploaded. I prayed that someone would notice the pattern didn’t apply to BEN.”

What the hell are you talking about, “applying to BEN”? Isn’t BEN, like, the cartridge? Or the game file? Or the ghost? So how could a pattern made out of equipping certain items possibly apply to him?! Or, since he IS the game, how could it not apply to him?!

“The tags followed suit too, I hope you guys paid attention to those as well. They were my little messages to you – nothing big enough that would catch Ben’s attention or make him suspect anything – with Ben manipulating and changing my files, I honestly hope that what you guys saw was close to what actually happened, but there is no way for me to know.”

Yeeeeeah fuck you, I’m not going to go check your tags. You don’t pay me enough.

[Editor’s Note: … We don’t pay you anything.]

AND THEREIN LIES THE PROBLEM!

“This may be a long read, I don’t have time to proof-read or make all of my research pretty.”

Oh, why start now?

“But here it all is. September 6, 2010 11:00pm – Can’t believe what happened, not sure if this is some kind of elaborate hoax, despite the fear I can’t help but be exceptionally curious about this. Who or what is the statue? Lot of questions here. I’m starting this document as a “diary” so I can keep track of everything. I’m typing up a summary of what happened so I can come back to it later.”

… Fuck me, the Pasta’s looping itself.

September 7, 2010 2:10am – (Summary was posted here, you can go back and look at my first post for day four.wmv for that)”

Cough cough cough.

“4:23am – I can’t sleep. I’ve been trying so hard but the harder I try I just get more restless. I just feel like that statue is appearing whenever I close my eyes.”

Annnnd cue SCP 173 reference!

… Actually, that’s a good point. Considering how the SCP Foundation and Creepypastas move in the same circles, has somebody made a BEN and SCP 173 cross-over yet?

[Editor’s Note: Actually, they have!]

Really? Well, let’s take a look-

… Um. Wow. That is… that’s pretty bad, but you know, I don’t want to try and insult somebody for just having fun with their creative past-time. An admittedly anti-Semitic and homophobic past-time with terrible vocals and rhyming, but still-

[Editor’s Note: There’s an entire YouTube channel made out of these things.]

… Well gee, look at the time, it’s fuck you o’clock.

“8:20am – Didn’t sleep at all, just going to start my day. I don’t think I have the energy to go to class today, I’m going to drive back down to talk to that old man, taking my buddy Tyler with me just in case.”

Wait, this guy has friends?!

SUSPENSION OF DISBELIEF: GONE.

“1:18pm – Back home now. No sign of the old man, really weird that he appears to be moving the next day, but maybe the For Sale sign was up there yesterday and I just didn’t notice it. Tyler wants to know what’s gotten me all worked up, I didn’t tell him. Going to eat, feel like death.”

That’s fine, just make sure you’re not feeling up Death.

Because she may be the physical personification of mortality itself, but she’s still a lady, and you should treat her like one.

[And while searching for that picture, I accidentally found pictures of two dead women, bleeding out on a kitchen floor. Which is when my computer, which has been having problems all evening… froze, and forced me to stare at it as I tried to get it to close.]

[Yeeeeah, we’re calling it quits for tonight.]

 

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4 Responses to “Internet Campfire Tales: BEN Drowned, A Creepypasta Review, Part Eleven”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Internet Campfire Tales: BEN Drowned, A Creepypasta Review, Part Twelve | A VERY STRANGE PLACE - November 15, 2014

    […] on BEN Drowned: There were things that happened. Go read the other parts. Having to write these summaries day in and day out is like my own personal […]

  2. Internet Campfire Tales: BEN Drowned, A Creepypasta Review, Part Thirteen | A VERY STRANGE PLACE - November 20, 2014

    […] on BEN Drowned: Somehow, the haunted Majora’s Mask cartridge has managed to take control of Cleverbot! My god, if it manages to nab Omegle too, I’ll be out of […]

  3. Internet Campfire Tales: BEN Drowned, A Creepypasta Review, Part Fourteen | A VERY STRANGE PLACE - November 21, 2014

    […] on BEN Drowned: Either Jadusable’s little choo-choo has gone around the bend, or BEN is controlling his mind from inside his electronics. Um. […]

  4. Internet Campfire Tales: BEN Drowned, A Creepypasta Review, Part Fifteen | A VERY STRANGE PLACE - November 27, 2014

    […] on BEN Drowned: Hmm. Actually, I think I made a charming infographic that could sum up what’s happened thus […]

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