it’s the ultimate weapon

4 Mar

[Editor’s Note: Oh, right, you’re still in high school! Hah hah hah ahhah, how’s that homework coming along, little kid?]

Well, first of all, take a long fuck-off off a short pier. And secondly, I haven’t started it yet.

[Editor’s Note: Ah. Presumably you figured the teacher was using some kind of esoteric translation of “due tomorrow” that equaled out to “whenever the fuck I get around to it”.]

No, no, see- whenever I stay up really late, I get sleep madness, right? But I always write better when I’m loopy, so I’ll get better marks! Ergo, I’m gonna stay up as late as possible and chug at least six energy drinks.

[Editor’s Note: … There’s a flaw in this plan, and I plan to drink as many energy drinks as possible until I figure it out.]

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