Internet Campfire Tales: Abandoned By Disney, A Creepypasta Review, Part Three

19 May

Ah hah! No, I have not forgotten about this Creepypasta review, it’s simply… well, it’s difficult to get enthusiastic about what appears to be a running history lesson about Disney theme parks.

internet_campfire_tales

Previously, on Abandoned By Disney: There was a resort. It was abandoned. By Disney. Try to keep up.

Ahem!

“Well, what I’m getting at is that this blog about Treasure Island got me thinking. Even though many years had passed since its closing, I figured it might be cool to do some “Urban Exploration” at Mowgli’s Palace.”

I know you’re talking about walking around and looking at stuff, but I shall instead assume you mean parkouring through an abandoned resort. Because that would be METAL.

“Take some photos, write about my experience, and probably see if there was anything I could take home as a memento.”

Like malaria, for instance.

“I’m not going to say I wasted no time in getting there, because honestly it took me another year after I first found that Treasure Island article to get around to going up to Emerald Isle.”

I will never stop confusing that with Ireland until the day Mickey Mouse strangles me in my sleep.

“Over the course of that year, I did a lot of research on the Palace resort… or rather, I tried to. Naturally, no official Disney site or resource made any mention of the place. That had been scrubbed clean.”

But they’re perfectly fine with this Creepypasta being online? Maybe they just don’t want to piss off Slimebeast.

“Even odder, however, was that nobody before myself had apparently thought to blog about the place or even post a photo. None of the local TV or Newspaper sites had one word about the place, though that was to be expected since they had all swung Disney’s way.”

Huh, and here I thought newspapers and TV were bi-corporational.

“They wouldn’t be out there lauding their embarrassment, you know?”

Why not? They have Mighty Ducks on their resume, after all.

Why am I in a world that allowed this to happen?

 

“Recently, I learned that corporations can actually ask Google, for example, to remove links from search results… basically for no good reason. Looking back, it’s probably not that nobody spoke of the resort, but rather their words were made inaccessible.”

Or Disney installed mind control devices into anyone who watched Lion King.

“So in the end I could barely find the place. All I had to go on was an old-as-hell map I’d received in the mail back in the 90s. It was a promotional item sent out to people who had recently been to Disney world, and I guess since I had been there in the late 80s, that was “recent”.”

You could tell, because of all the Mr. T pictures on the map. And the cocaine.

“I didn’t really intend to hang onto it. It just got shoved in with my books and comics from my childhood. I’d only remembered it months into my research, and even then it took me another few weeks to locate the storage bin my parents had shoved it all into.”

Oh, sure, parents always keep random sheets of paper that children don’t care about. Abso-fucking-lutely.

… No, seriously, do they do that? I don’t know.

“But I DID find it. Locals were no help, as most were transplants who had moved to the beach in recent years… or old residents who just sneered at me and made rude gestures the second I managed to say “Where would I find Mowgli’s—“”

Maybe they were just fans of the book.

Wait, there was a book?!

No Shere Kahn?! Zero stars.

 

“The drive took me through an inordinately long corridor of overgrowth. Tropical plants that had run rampant and overpopulated the area mixed with the native species of flora that actually BELONGED there and had tried to reclaim the land.”

Fight! Fight! Fight! FINISH HIM! FLAWLESS VICTORY!

“I was in awe when I reached the front gates of the resort. Tremendous, monolithic wooden gates whose supports to either side looked like they must’ve been cut from giant sequoias. The gate itself had been gouged in several places by woodpeckers and eaten away at the base by burrowing insects.”

… Well, doesn’t THAT seem welcoming.

“Hanging on the gate was a sheet of metal, some random scrap, with hand-painted letters scrawled in black. “ABANDONED BY DISNEY”. Clearly the handiwork of some past local or an employee who wanted to make some small protest.”

Or the handiwork of a Creepypasta author who wanted to make a title drop?

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One Response to “Internet Campfire Tales: Abandoned By Disney, A Creepypasta Review, Part Three”

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  1. Internet Campfire Tales: Abandoned By Disney, A Creepypasta Review, Part Four | A VERY STRANGE PLACE - May 26, 2015

    […] on Abandoned By Disney: Disney, after a bout of racism, abandoned a resort to be swallowed up by the jungle, and our […]

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